A client of mine recently shared something that broke my heart a little. “No one takes me seriously at work. It feels like the whole system is against me. Like it’s always going to be this way.” She wasn’t being dramatic—she was genuinely stuck in a painful moment.She had great ideas. She cared about code […]

One of my cats recently made her feelings very clear when my partner didn’t clean the litter box fast enough… by pooping on his bed. Effective? Sure. Productive? Not so much. At work, we sometimes do the same thing—except instead of actual poop, we drop unfiltered complaints, frustration, or negativity onto our manager’s lap. The […]

Everyone is just doing their job. But sometimes, those jobs can unintentionally clash—and that’s where things get tricky. I was recently talking to a career coaching client who shared an interesting challenge she’s facing at work. Her company’s customer support team really likes her. So much so that they keep sending her support tickets and […]

I’ve gotten pretty good at inviting myself to parties and events—especially the ones I wasn’t originally invited to. Whenever I overheard an interesting conversation (I’m a fantastic eavesdropper, by the way), I’d casually say, “Oh, can I join?” Usually in a public enough setting that it was hard for them to say no. I know […]

When a client graduates from my coaching, I ask if they’d be willing to give me a short testimonial at the end of their last session. So far all of my clients have said yes. This testimonial is transcribed by the client’s request to preserve anonymity. Rachel: What specific goals or challenges were you hoping to […]

Not all managers are great at mentorship or giving feedback. It’s just a fact.

Your manager might be fantastic in other areas—like clearing roadblocks, building a great team culture, or fighting for your priorities. But when it comes to guiding your career or giving thoughtful feedback, they might drop the ball.

If you’re someone who values mentorship or clear, actionable feedback, this can be really frustrating. It can even make you doubt yourself or feel stuck in your role. But here’s the truth: mentorship and feedback are critical for growth, and you don’t have to depend solely on your manager to get them.

Here’s how to take control of your development when your manager isn’t meeting your mentorship needs.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of seeing challenges at work as opportunities to mess up. I hear this a lot from mentees, especially when they’re dealing with high-pressure situations like production issues. Just the other day, I was chatting with a mentee who told me how stressful she finds production incidents. She said, […]

We’ve all been there. You need advice, and a former mentor or coworker pops into your mind.

But then the doubt creeps in: “Will they think I’m annoying if I reach out?”

Let me clear this up right away—no, it’s not annoying. In fact, most people appreciate it. Reaching out is a form of networking, and when done thoughtfully, it strengthens relationships and opens doors. Let’s dive into why this fear is unfounded and how to confidently send that message.

I used to be very, very… very polite.

In my first year at my job, I decided to invite my mentor and his wife over for dinner.

“Would you and your wife be willing to come over for dinner? If it’s not too much trouble?”

His response? “You make it sound like coming over for dinner is a terrible thing.”

(They did come over, by the way.)

That moment stuck with me. It taught me an important lesson: Your phrasing matters.

We’ve all been there—those days when exhaustion hits hard, but work still needs to get done. Whether it’s from back-to-back meetings, life outside of work, or sleepless nights, working while exhausted is something we all face from time to time. But how do you get through it without completely draining your energy or burning out? […]